The Black Hole of Romantica's Gravity
by The shadow flower ninja
Summary: The story begins when Shuichi "cheats" on Yuki, happens when Eiri becomes a kidnapper, and ends when Akihiko files a law suit aganist Eiri...Misaki always knew Usagi-san's BL novels would get him into trouble, he just didn't expect it to be this much!
1. Chapter 1

One of the many instances where I question my sanity and think, "What the muffins was I on?" This came to me in a dream one night when I was high off of Pixy Sticks and Red Bull(neither of which I own) . How was I able to sleep when I was wired enough to give a buffalo a heart attack? Well I'm just weird like that. I know I have others stories to do but I have had this on my mind for a while so I'm just going to post this and then work on my others. Anyways, enjoy~!

Summary:The story begins when Shuichi "cheats" on Yuki, happens when Eiri becomes a kidnapper, and ends when Akihiko files a law suit aganist Eiri.

...Misaki always knew that Usagi-san's BL novels would get him into trouble, he just didn't expect it to be this much!

~*~*~*~*~~*~*~*The black hole of Romantica's Gravity*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_**Chapter one: Shuichi, the cheater**_

He felt dirty.

Unbelievably dirty, he felt like everything he touched became soiled, ruined, disgusting, just like he was...

Now he was far from what one would call "grown up" or "sophisticated" or "smart" or-

Okay he was a stupid brat, big deal!

But he wasn't as naïve as every one thought he was, he knew things about the world and how it worked. He wasn't too dim enough to believe that everything between him and Yuki would remain perfect forever, no matter how much he wanted it too, it just wasn't real.

...He just got so **lonely **sometimes, it often felt like he was living alone, even when Yuki was home with him, it somehow got quieter when the author was home.

That's how it all started.

He was just walking around town one day. trying to get his mind off of his distant lover, enjoying the bustling commotion that only a big city could hope to create when he passed by a book store. Now, Shuichi was far from the reading type, heck, he could hardly read music! But he saw a poster advertising his Yuki new book, deciding to pore salt on the wound on a masochist's whim, Shuichi went in to get a closer look. To see the one thing that would forever remain top in Yuki's heart chart. Shuichi had come to understand that this was one mistress that he couldn't ever tear away from Yuki; there was no competition, no rivalry so to speak, he knew that he would never stand a chance against **_her_**.

As he picked up his most hated opponent and glanced at her personality, tragic but beautiful as always, something had caught his eye. There stood, right next to them, the most stunning _person _Shuichi had ever seen in his life. HE stood proudly and boldly as he sported a blue outfit with a colorful array of pinks and blues that seemed to only suit him.

Upon further inspection Shuichi found him to be a lonely kindered soul, just like himself, searching for that special someone that could bring life back into **him**. The young singer found himself feeling something he never felt before, he wanted to get to know this _person_, he wanted to know everything about HIM.

And for a while that's how it was, Shuichi and the stranger would meet up in that same book store, and sometimes in a rare occasion other book stores as well, and the stranger would reveal more and more about _himself _to the young musician, entrancing him more and more in **his** intentional web.

However, as time went on, people started to question Shu-chan on just where he went, why he never seemed to be home during their days off, why he never seemed to want to hang out anymore. Shuichi could only make up so many excuses that were believable for so long.

And eventually it happened, he was caught red handed by his best friend of forever, Nakano Hiroshi. It was completely by accident that Hiro discovered his dirty little secret; he just got back from his getting his bike fixed and saw Shuichi and his new **_love _**thru the window.

What sickened Shuichi though was that Hiro didn't seem to mind that it was actually Shuichi cheating on Yuki this time and not the other way around. In fact, Hiro encouraged this affair! He supported this "change of pace" as he liked to call it, saying that he was glad that Shu had found that special something that Yuki didn't seem to have in someone else.

After Hiro had discovered his sin everyone else started to as well. it got mixed feelings. Fujisaki seemed shocked, K and Sakano were neutral, Sakuma-san was sad that Shu didn't have time for him and Kuma-chan anymore now that he had a new **"love"**,Seguchi-sama seemed oddly pleased with it but there was and underlings look in his eyes that made Shuichi a little jumpy. His adoreable sister, Maiko couldn't believe that her Shu-Oniichan could love anyone more than Yuki-niisama, and his mother, urgh, she could hardly contain her joy at Shuichi's new interest! Honestly, didn't anyone believe in the sanctity of faithfulness anymore?

Apparently not anyone he knew did.

The only ones who didn't know of this were; his fans, Tatsuha, Mika-san, and his lovely Yuki.

It was all going as smoothly as possible, like making a house of cards smoothly, but like that same stack, it all went tumbling down with the gust of wind known as a big mouth.

Why couldn't Yuki have a normal brother in stead of nosey Tatsuha?

* * *

"No one is currently home, if you like to leave a message, please wait **AFTER (1)**, the tone!"

-Bbbeeepp!_

"_Hey Shuichi! I found out that you really love _**-ccccccccccccrrrrrrrrr**_- cheating on my bro like that! If your wondering how I found out it's because Thoma told me, I was calling to see what big bro thought about sharing you with _**-ccccccccrrrrrrrr**_- I never would have thought_** -ccccccccrrrrrrrrr-**_ that you would actually_**-ccccccccrrrrr- -ccccrrrr-** _Bro might want to watch out for Usami Akihiko's_**-ccccccccrrrrrr**-_, he might just take__ you away from him! Oh, and tell bro that I need to borrow some of his 'underware,' don't ask why I just need them!"_

-Beep!-

It one of those time when one would never doubt the existence of irony when the famous novelist had chosen that particular time for a beer brake, at the exact same moment that the phone call had started.

...

...

Shuichi was **so** going to get kicked out of the house.

* * *

"WWAAAAHHH, HIRO! YUKI THREW ME OUT OF THE HOUSE!"

"Hm, already? Didn't he just let you back in yesterday? You didn't even last a day, that's got to be a new personal best Shuichi."

"HIRO YOU BASTARD! I JUST GOT KICKED OUT OF THE HOME I SHARED WITH THE LOVE OF MY EXISTANCE AND YOU DON'T EVEN CARE?"

"Yeah pretty much."

"DIDN'T YOU SAY THE YOU WOULD BEHIND ME 100%! THAT 'YOUR DREAM IS MY DREAM?'"

"yeah."

"THEN WHY ARE YOU BEING A DICK AND NOT HELPING ME WITH YUKI?"

"Because I'm tired, try again tomarrow."

"YOU BASTARD! YOU WOULD RATHER SLEEP THEN HELP ME WIN BACK MY TRUE LOVE?"

"Yes."

"I HOPE YOUR DICK FALLS OFF WHEN YOU FINALLY ALMOST GET LUCKY WITH- HEY! DON'T IGNORE ME! HHHIIIIIRRRROOOO~!"

"Hey, why did Yuki-san kick you out for anyway?"

"I-!... Don't know, I wasn't even noisy!"

"..."

"Okay I was, but it wasn't the usual noisy!"

"Hmm, maybe he working on his latest novel or something."

"H-hiro, you don't think he could've found out about, _you know who_, do you?"

"About Usami Akihiko-"

"Sshh!"

"Shuichi, it's not like anyone is secretly listening in on our conversations or anything, it's just us here."

"Seguchi-sama might be!"

"Yeah because our boss would totally go out of his way to make sure to put a bug in the houses of everyone who works for him just because he-...Actually he really might do that. Even so, it's not like you're doing anything wrong, so there no need to worry about it."

"How can you say I'm not doing anything wrong? I like a book another man wrote over the work of my wonderfully sexy novelist! That's considered cheating in the world of art! I've been cheating on my lovely, wonderful, darilng Yuki with another man!"

"Shuichi, just because you prefer another person's book over Yuki-san's doesn't mean your cheating on him. In fact I'm sure Yuki-san would encourage your new hobby too if he knew that it made you a whole lot quieter."

"No! Yuki must **never** find out about my moments of weakness, it's a secret that I'll take to the grave!"

"You know he's going to find out someday, and it's not that big a deal! **It's just a book**."

"It's not just a book! How would you feel if your special someone preferred that crappy guitarist from that new band, (2)L' Arc~en~Ciel, over your awesome skills?"

"First of all, that won't ever happen because that guy probably can't even tell the difference between an A-cord and a G-string. Secondly, I would have let it go, some people are just better than other at certain things, you can't be the best at everything you do."

"Yuki can! It's just me and my whorish ways that are ruining things!"

"Shuichi just relax, everything will work out fine in it's own time. Just wait until Yuki-san cools down and see what you did wrong in the morning."

"Okay, fine...Hey do you really think that this L'Arc~en~Ciel band is going to be bad?"

"Trust me, they don't stand a chance."

* * *

A week later at N-G studios

"And in other news: L'Arc~en~Ciel took the top spot in the Oricon(3) charts this week, their debut single, _'Daybreak's Bell' _took the music industry by storm! It looks like the guys from Bad Luck better look out for this new and exciting group! Now back to you Satoshi~!"

.

.

.

"...Well, fuck.."

* * *

You didn't think that Shuichi would actually cheat on Yuki did you?

(1)Was I the only one that thought that the answering machine sounded a little too agressive in the OVA?

(2) I love L'Arc~en~Ciel, this was sort of an inside joke.

(3) Oricon is the Asian music ranking chart.

Next time: _"Whoa, Bro! Don't you think you're taking this a little too far?"_

_"...No, not really."_

_"This is a federal crime!"_

_"When has that ever stopped us before?"_

_"It's not like before! We are kidnapping and to make matters worse we'er abducting Usami Akihiko's-!"_

_" I can get you some 'alone time' with that idiot singer you like so much."_

_"...Damn. Alright fine, let's do this."_

Next time: Yuki, the kidnapper!


	2. Yuki, the kidnapper!

I had a sudden burst of inspiration for this, so I kept writing and writing and before I knew it, the second chapter was done! Enjoy everybody~!

Review Responses:

_**Nowaki-star:…**_. MUFFINS! I love your, JunJou Romantica and Kuroshitsuji parodies! When I was first writing this it was going to be an Angst and Drama fic, but then Tatsuha came in and was like: "I need to borrow bro's 'underwear' write that down!' And then all seriousness went out the window, like an obese clown tripping over a puppy.

_**HanabiKage**_: In the words of Hiro: "…Well, fuck…" Thanks for pointing that out! I usually don't update as quickly as this so I sometimes forget things like a disclaimer. And also...

HAIL KUMAZUKI! XD

**Disclaimer: I DO OWN GRAVITATION AND JUNJOU ROMANTICA~!**

Yuki: Yeah, and I'm secretly a straight guy that has a wife and some kids, and I actually love my family, especially my _oh so loveable_brother-in-law! Shuichi and I are just gay for pay.

_**S**_**ee? Even Yuki said it!**

Hiroki: Tell the truth brat! **Or else.**

**Okay, okay fine! I don't own Gravitation or JunJou Romantica!**

+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+**The Black Hole of Romantica's Gravity**~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~

**Chapter two: Yuki, the Kidnapper!**

He was Pissed off.

Now if you knew this man personally, you would just shrug and say:"No Shit Sherlock." For it was not the first, and would most likely not the last, time this man became pissed off at something.

Hell, this man was angry even when he was happy! So it was not a surprise that he came storming into N-G production's head office on a Friday after noon with an angry expression marring his pretty face.

What was surprising however was what he was currently dragging along with him, **it** seemed so _out of place_ next to the sinfully blond novelist.

'Twas a paradox in itself that the golden eyed beauty even had such an **item**in his possession, let alone that he was actually carrying _it _around with him in broad daylight!

But then again, novelist Yuki Eiri a lot of strange things since he met Shindo Shuichi, didn't he?

This was just one of many blemishes on his already diminishing reputation, he hardly even cared anymore! It's not like he had any women to seduce anymore since he came out of the closet, that he was _oh so fond_of staying in, in front of national television that one time. And even thou he rather choke on his own dick than say this out loud, he really did love the little brat known as Shuichi, vocalist of Bad Luck!

But right now was a different story entirely.

_HIS_ moron,

_HIS _stupid brat,

_HIS_ toilet hole, was being stolen from him... By another author.

Normally something like this wouldn't have bothered him. (he got more work done in this past month that he did in the the three years that he'd known the pink haired punk). However this new 'hobby' was starting to get out of hand, the brat was always too tired or asleep when Yuki was '_in the mood'_, and he was _**not**_ about to jerk himself off.

( His teenage years were plenty enough for him thank you!)

Sure he could probably find a one night stand or something,

(If not a girl than at least Tohma was always open(1))

and he would have,

( Come on now, do you really expect some one like_the Yuki Eiri _to stay faithful when there was no sex? Sorry sugar tits , love alone can't keep a man's libido satisfied.)

if it weren't for his damn pride!

Seriously how many times did he have to tell that baka that he wants to be top on his 'heart's chart' before he got the message? Yuki could have sworn that he heard the name,"Akihiko." come from the brat mouth one night! Out of all the people for that idiot to have a crush on, why the hell did it have to be that guy? Yuki could say with 100% certainty that he absolutely hated Usami Akihiko, he was even more sure that the feeling was mutuel. From the first time that they met, which was about thriteen years ago, to probably the rest of their lives, the wouldn't get along. One would say that they were similar in a few ways; but to them, they couldn't be any different from each other. To Akihiko, Eiri was just some brat that had the close type of relationship with his family that Akihiko didn't with his. To Eiri, Akihiko was just some dumb old man that was lucky enough to have enough asian looks to fit in when Eiri himself did not.

Yeah, it was pretty obvious to everyone but them that they were just jealous of each other.

But instead of just doing the intelligent thing and just avoiding each othe like the plague or a newly divorced couple like the rest of us normal people-

"If your not going to narrate right, then don't narrate at all Tatsuha!" My blond look alike snarled while scowling at me, which is rued if your ask me-

"First off, I'm older than you retard. Second, I wouldn't be scowling at you if you just do your job right!" He stated while grabing his crotch and picking his nose-

" I didn't do any of that!" The readers don't know that.

"Eat shi- wait, what readers? Don't tell me you sold the rights to my life to some crazy fan girl again! It's bad enough that I have to go along with _everything_they say, no matter how unlikey it is, it's even worse that I don't even get paid for it! I mean, it's my life and my dick, I should at least get paid for their use!"

Um...Uh look, it's Tohma's office door!

"Hey don't change the subject! I wasn't finished-"

I've got to go, my Ryuichi senses are tingling! Thanks for the **_pants_** bro!

Wait- Oh, this feels weird. Uh, so do I just- Okay, so... That bastard Akihiko has stolen the brat from me so now I have taken** something**from him in revenge. NO I am NOT jealous of him, I look a hell of a lot better than that old fart ever will, thank you very much! You, know what, just cut to the next scene. It's a proven fact that anything involving that bastard kills your brain cells if you dwell on it too long! . . . That, and I need to get more 'underware' from Tohma and I don't want you perverts watching!

* * *

**This is the Usami residence, Usami-san is not here at the moment please leave a message and- Baka Usagi, I'm trying to set the answering machine! Hey, let go-!**

**-Beep!-**

"_Akihiko you ass hole! Why the hell did that brat not show up for school today? If you think that I'm going to extend the due date of his report than your dead wrong! If he's not here again tomorrow than you won't have a dick to fuck him with!"_

**-Beep!-**

Oh how irony just loves to torture poor souls like the famous writer, Usami Akihiko. He just came back from a trip that his harpie of an editor, Aikawa, made him take for promonitional purposes, and he didn't take Misaki with him...

.

.

.

.

.

.

Someone was **so** gonna die...

/

/

/

/

/

Or at least get arrested.

* * *

Takahashi Misaki liked to think that he was fairly good at taking anything that the crazy Usami family delt with stride, especially the kidnappings, but when someone else kidnaped him...Well, lets just say that all sense just whent out the door for our poor collage student. Seriously, what's with people and kidnapping him? Misaki swore that if this man wanted him for anything other than ransome, he'd lose it. It started out just like anyother day, he was making lunch for himself and thinking about what he could do for Usagi-san; since he would be returning home today after a month away on tour. Then **it** happened-

_"Hello, I am from the 'Make a bear fondation'? What the hell does that- Oh um, yeah, anyways that's where I'm am from! I come to you today to deliver a package of love and fluff to a Usami Akihiko-san, is he here today?" Asked a somewhat familiar looking man(Where could Misaki have seen him? Maybe from the store, he did look like he could stack cans...) with an uncommon shade of blond hair and the most dangerous pair of golden eyes that Misaki had ever seen. _

_"Um no, he should be back sometime later this evening." _

_"Dammit! How are we supose-Ah, I mean, do you know exactly what time he'll be back?"_

_"He said something about 9:30. If you want, you could leave the package with me, I live here too, he's my land lord and I'm watching the house for him while he's gone."_

_"Urgh that damn old man- Wait...Did you say that you're **living here** with him?"_

_"Um yeah, he's my land lord-"_

_"As in actually living in the same house with him while he's here?"_

_"Yeah he's my land lord-"_

_"So you're **living here with him?**"_

_"He's just my land lord, that's all!"_

_"Yeah sure I believe you. Anyways, could I ask you to step outside for a bit and sign this?"_

_"Yeah sure fine."_

_"Thanks!"_

_"Your-wait. did that box just talk! ?"_

_"Grab him Tatsuha!"_

_"What! ? !"_

**_BAM!_**

Misaki knew that he should have listen to his gut when it told him this man, and his box, where trouble. The guy didn't have the bear constume that the other delivery men wore, heck, he didn't even sing the bear song!

Thankfully however, when he woke up he was tied to a chair while his kidnappers argued with each was a good way to learn about what these guy wanted; `your kidnapper's confusion is your solution!' Being kidnapped enough times taught you that sort of thing.

"Bro don't you think that you're taking this a bit too far? I mean we didn't have to kidnap him and knock him out did we?"

"That bastard took my property, it only fair that I take his as well."

"We don't even know if it's like that with this kid and Akihiko-niisan!"

"A blind monkey could probably tell that they were going out, why can't you?"

"Bro for kami-sama's sake! We are breaking the law, this is kidnapping!"

"When has the law mattered to you? Weren't you the one that said"**Fuck the man, fight the power!**" When the police finally caught up with you, after you drove Mika's car in a ditch that one time?"

" At least no one got hurt too bad, except that old man; what's up with the elderly and walking around at night? Their just asking for some one to run their old asses over! And this is a whole lot different, we just kidnapped the lover of the famous author, and don't forget son of the Usami group's head, Usami Akihiko! They could throw both of us in the slammer for this! And I am _not_ going to be some weirdo's 'Little lotus blossom' you hear me? Never, they won't take me alive!"

"I'll get you some **alone time**with that idoit singer you love so much."

"...Damn, fine. But if they catch us I'm saying that this was all your doing and that you threated to kill a whole bunch of orphan children if I didn't help you. That way I come off as both a hero and a victim!"

"Tatsuha, has anyone ever told you that you are a fucking retard?"

"Come to think of it, there was that one time that mom did."

Misaki was starting to lose hope of ever having a normal life.

* * *

Yes done! Thanks for the favorte alert and reviews guys, your awesome! (1)I believe that there was a mega-mix that featured this.

**Next time:Akihiko, the lawyer!**


	3. Akihiko, the lawyer part one

**Hey people~! Sorry it took so long to update,but I have great news! I won a new computer somehow, so now I can update my stories at a much faster rate now~! So let's get on with the show~!**

Akihiko: Don't you mean story?

**NO!**

**Disclaimer: Do I have to?**

Akihiko: -Glares-

**-sigh- I don't own Gravitation or JunJou Romantica...**

**Dedicated to: Nowaki-star, thanks for helping me out with this~! :)**

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**The Black Hole of Romantica's Gravity~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_**_

Chapter Three: **Akihiko, the lawyer!(part one)**

**He was thinking.**

This was never an uncommon act, as he made his living by thinking. The thought that he was currently acting on however, could be considered, somewhat _**germane**_.

It was not like he didn't think about these types thoughts at all, yet it also wasn't like he didn't ever think of them.

He only thought about them when some one got just a little **too** close to **his** oh so **endearing _housemate._**

_"Please, just stop, PLeAse! !"_

The man snorted disgustedly at the fact that it seemed all to often that such situations occurred. Subconsciously digging his sharp implement in the already unrecognizable piece of flesh that was seated in front of him. It crunched as the knife sunk deeper and deeper, until the strange man cut a huge piece of the agonized flesh right off the tortured soul's body. As the wails and pleads for help got more and more distorted, the strange writer smiled fondly at the meat, as if imagining something much more pleasant than what was currently in front of him.

Misaki,

**HIS **adorable house mate

**HIS **sexy collage student

**HIS** little idiot, had been taken from him.

And he was going to get him back, or his name wasn't Usami Akihiko.

_"AHHHHAAGAHGUGH!"_

If there was anything Akihiko prided himself on other than writing, it would be this. The now unrecognizable piece of meat squelched as fluid started to leak from it in little streams of crimson. The Usami writer smiled cruelly at the agonized flesh, as if taunting into submission, and yet all he got in response was silence.

Usami knew that this thing would not have the answers that he sought, but he still needed it for a much _more pratical_ purpose. Akihiko would need this if he was gong to be in top form to find Misaki. Yet he already had somewhat of an idea on who took him.

Who other than his bastard of a brother, Haruhiko, would be stupid enough to try and take Misaki from him?

Couldn't that man take a hint? Misaki picked **him**, Misaki would always choose **him.** But of course, Akihiko also knew that that alone would not be enough to stop Haruhiko from trying. If there was anything Akihiko respected about his brother, it would be his persistence; that man never gave up on anything if he wanted bad enough.

Yet, he was surely mistaken if he thought that he could take Misaki away from him that easily. Akihiko could be just as, if not more, cunning than Haruhiko if he wanted to.

What he was doing now was a testament of that fact.

_Ring, Ring!_

The Usami writer stopped his gruesome task to answer the phone, plunging the knife in a nearby block, as if reminding the meat that he would be back and that his horrid act would continue as soon as he hung up.

_"NO, No, NONONONONOOOOOOO!"_

"Usami residence."

_"Any luck finding the brat yet Akihiko?"_ came a deep baritone on the other line.

"No, not yet Hiroki, but I have a pretty good guess on who took him."

_"Let me guess, Haruhiko?"_ Hiroki snorted in annoyance._"Are you sure that the little punk just didn't step out for a bit? It hasn't even been a day yet! Don't you think you should wait until you're sure that he has been kidnapped before going crazy and dragging everyone you know, that isn't Takahiro, to help you look for him! ?"_ Akihiko was fairly surprised that Hiroki could say all of that in one breath, but then again, it was Hiroki Kamijou he was talking about here. The guy could put a whole opera to shame with his amazing breath support. But Akihiko had no time to sit and ponder his long-time friend's amazing ability to blow right now, he had to find Misaki!

"I _**know**_ that Misaki has been kidnapped, there is no time to waste!"

"HELP ME PLEASE ! !"

_"What was that?"_ Hiroki asked, alarmed at the scream for help and the urgency lacing it's tone.

"It's nothing, just ignore it." Akihiko dismissed.

"Make it stop! Just kill me already, I don't have what you want! STOP TOYING WITH ME YOU ANIMAL! !" The mysterious voice begged,sounding at wit's end and just wanting whatever torment it was going thru to end.

_"Akihiko, you didn't!"_ Hiroki gasped.

"Alright fine, you got me." Akihiko sighed, getting up from the couch he had settled on while strolling towards the middle of the room.

"_You found my old collection of horror movies!"_ Kamijou stated excitedly.

"Yeah, I finally cleared out my attic." Akihiko said solemnly while turning off the TV.

"_Yeah well, just make sure that you give them back. I've wanted them back for three months now!"_

_"_I haven't had them for that long." Akihiko snorted.

"_You borrowed them while we were still in collage!" _Kamijou barked.

"It still hasn't been that long."

"That was eight years ago!"

"So?"

"...Just get them back to me. SOON! But other than that, I'll keep an eye out for the brat. But, if he comes home like I told you he would, then I get to hit you with, a Britannia almanack!" And with that the devil of a collage professor hung up on the famous writer.

Akihiko went back into the kitchen and strolled over to the pantree and took out a loaf of bread from the top shelf. He then returned to the table he had perviously ocupied and picked up a tray of poorly cut ham that he himself cut before the phone call interuption. He picked up a fairly good (yet still pretty crappy looking) piece and ploped it on the bread before proceeding to put on the other condiments of his choice then finally topping it off with yet another pice of bread. Akihiko took a bite out of his own creation while smiling smugly.

Misaki would be proud.

* * *

Misaki was starting to get board.  
Honestly, how long could these two go at it! They have been argueing for at least an hour now, and it didn't look like they would stop anytime soon...

"At least I'm not some fugly old man!" The one with the black hair screamed.

"You and I have the same face dumb shit!" The scary blond barked back, Misaki was only here for at least a couple of hours, but he could already tell that the blond was some one he would never like to make an enemy out of; there was just something about this man that made Misaki uneasy. The black haired man however, didn't seem like he was dangerous at all. In fact, if things had been different, Misaki would have liked to have been friends with this man.

It goes without saying that friendship is pretty much out of the question now.

"At least I'm not old!"

"At least I can buy beer on my own instead of stealing it from that decrypted old fossil I call father!"

"At least I didn't beat my sister in beauty contest, for women, when I was sixteen! Oh but wait, didn't you do that?" The raven mocked.

"...you little shit," the blond muttered after a brief pause.

"Look on the bright side, you got a free trip to New York out of it!"

"..."

"I'm sorry bro. I went too far didn't I?" The black haired one said while looking down at the floor guiltily.

"Just forget about it," the blond dismissed with the wave of his hand, not bothering to turn and face his black haired companion.

"No, no. I was a dick to you, you deserve an apology."

"Tastuha I'm not a girl, don't treat me like one." The one now known as Tastuha grabbed the blond haired man by the wrist and spun him around to face him.

"I'm not trying to! I'm just trying to say that I'm sorry, I must have hurt your feelings right? You can try to hide it but it won't work on me!" Tastuha proclaimed while getting just a little **too close** to the blond man face. Misaki was really hoping that this conversation wasn't going where he thought it was...

"Your annoying, just go away," the blond snapped while wrenching his hand free from the raven's grip.

"No! I won't let you hide away, not this time!" The raven growled while backing the blond into a corner. Misaki really hoped that they'd notice that he was awake soon before things got towards what Usagi-san calls a **romantic climax** when he writes those trashy BL novels. That Misaki defiantly **does not read!**

"Look just drop it already and leave me the hell alone!"

"No! I'm not going to let you fester in your pain anymore! Can't you see that it hurts others almost as much as it hurts you!" Misaki _really, really_, wished that Usagi-san would move his butt and save him already!

"... I never asked anyone to pity with me, so shut up and leave me alone!" The blond snarled angerly while shoving the raven out of the way.

"Never," the raven wispered before gaining volume. "Never! I'll never leave you alone!" He shouted.

"Why!" the blond questioned desparately.

"Because I love you!" The raven proclaimed while connecting their lips in a built up moment of passion.

Goddamn it where the hell is bastard Usagi when you actually need him! ?

"I never asked you to love me." The blond voiced softly.

"They say you can't help who you fall in love with,"

"You...moron."

"Hey I'm fine with being one, if that means I'm yours."

"Tastuha,"

"Eir-"

-Thump!-

"Cool, he fainted!" Tastuha laughed while backing away from his blond haired older brother.

"Shut up and help me get him out of here," Eiri sighed.

"Aw come on bro, even you have to admit it was pretty funny to see him get all upset like that! And did you see how big his eyes got when we kissed? I thought he was going to keel over right there!" Tastuha snorted in supressed laughter while hoisting the unconsious brunette up in his arms.

"Yeah whatever, just get the brat out of here before my brat comes back." The blond novelist snapped while trying to fit the poor collage student in a brown sack.

" I know you thought it was funny too, or else you wouldn't have played along like that," Tastuha stated smugly.

"Believe what you will; I was just trying to knock him out without actually hitting him. I need him fully aware for this to work, I want to know all of that stupid buuny's weaknesses." Eiri hissed out the mention of the other novelist with venom.

"Sure you do," Tastuha humored. "Hey, do you want to freak him out more when he wakes up! ?" He asked with an excited glimen in his eye.

"What do you have in mind?"

* * *

Kamijou Hiroki was many things, but nice wasn't one of them.

It was just out of his nature, he was just meant to be a mean sadistic devil, he was meant to be feared damn it!

So why is that so many people (in his eyes anyway) are able to break threw to his soft center?

First there was that bastard, Bakahiko, with his strange ways, yet heart melting innocence and kindness; that won over Hiroki's friendship and first love.

Then there was _that man_ and his seemingly flawless perfection and gracefullness towards the musical arts; that dominated Hiroki's first date and second love.

And finally there was Kusama Nowaki.

An idiot that never gave up and continued on threw the devil's coldest ways and attempts to try and get rid of him, all the way with a goofy smile on his stupid face. A kind soul that was the exact opisite of Hiroki; his first serious relationship and third (hopefully final) love.

Each of them were special than all of the rest in their own special way, and all of them were completely different from each other.

So why is it that all of them managed to do the exact same amount of damage to Hiroki, how is it that all of them manage to make him cry?

"It's been quite a while, Hiroki-san,"_that man_ greeted with a smile. Hiroki was currently sitting in an expensive cafe with the one person he'd hoped that he'd never see again.

Seguchi Tohma.

* * *

Shindo Shuichi had just got back from work early; for his beloved Yuki had let him back into the house just last night and he wanted to _show his thanks;_ but as he pulled out his house key, the door swung open on it's own smashing the poor pop star in to the wall.

"Damn, for a small looking guy he sure is a fat ass!" A voice that sounded a lot like Tatsuha grunted.

"Just shut up and hold his legs!" That sounded like Yuki!

Shuichi shoved the door off of him and crawled out of the Shuichi-sized hole in the wall, only to see Tastuha and Yuki holding a really big sack, both staring at him with surprised eyes.

"What are you doing here brat?" Yuki questioned with a dirty glare.

''Just got off work," Shuichi said slowly while he eyed the really big bag." Whats in the bag?" He asked.

"None of your business," Yuki snapped while Tastuha draged the sack by himself towards the elevator. He accidentaly dropped the bag and as it hit the floor it made a muffled sound of pain, then proceeded to wiggle and make muffled noises.

"What the hell is going on Yuki! ?" Shuichi demaned while storming over to the bag, he swore if it was another hooker he'd-!

Before Shu could get any closer to the bag, Eiri swung into action and connected their lips together into a kiss while Tatsuha quickly draged the bag into the elevator as Eiri slowly draged both him and Shu-chan to the elevator's entrance before finally allowing their lips to part.

"I'm just going to give Tohma his make up kit back, you know how he gets when he goes without it for so long. If anyone calls just say that I went to see my father, same as always okay?"

"Okay Yuki~!" Shuichi giggled dreamily.

"Alright then I'm off. Don't touch my stuff or my beer, if I find one can missing your dead brat!"

"Okay Yuki~!" Eiri rolled his eyes before the elevator doors closed. Shuichi just stared at the spot that use to hold Yuki with a dreamy smile on his face, completely forgetting about the strange moving bag's exsitance.

"Okay Yuki~!" He said one more time before-

"Okay Yuki~!" Oh, I guess not.

"Okay Yuki~!" Um, maybe he just needs more time...

-Three hours later-

"Okay Yuki~!' He said for the **_upteenth time_**-

"Okay Yuki~!" Okay thats it I give up! He's been doing that for almost four hours now!

"'Okay Yuki~!" I'm surrouned by idiots...

* * *

**I know this was crap but I wanted to get something out and start working/fixing my other stories. I might need a beta for this.**

**Well, I'm almost out for summer break so all I have to do during the days is go to work so I should be updating much quicker now, so the lag time for next chapter should be fairly short, hopefully next chapter won't be as serious as this one sort of was.**

**Next time~**

_"How- how dare you act like-like a **gentleman!** I'M sopose to be the nice guy here!"_

_"N-Nowaki-kun, please calm down!"_

_"No! I won't take it anymore, I'm tired of you always trying to take Hiro-san from me, with your- NICENESS! You think you can be a better person than me? Well then, you've got another thing coming friend!"_

_"So then you're not upset about the melon?"_

_"Of course I'm upset about the melon!"_

**_Next time~Akihiko, the lawyer! (part two)~_**


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